everyone's stressed, tired and stretched thin.

we're all in the same boat.

yet, not everyone snaps at other people, or forget other people's feelings in the midst of rushing through everything we've to do. it could be the way you release your stress, but it's not fair to the people around you who has to take that crap.

despite the crazy schedules/things we've to do, i still take the time to settle down almost every night and think about the interactions with the people around me. i think it's because my friends are too important for me to risk doing something so stupid that i piss them off. everytime i feel i did something wrong i'll think over it, and learn from the experience. why doesn't everyone do that? the world would be such a nicer place.

i don't mean i'm fantastically nice, i don't mean the world should be like me. i have my mean side, gloomy days, angsty days. but the difference is, i don't show it. the most i do is to stay silent, and not smile as much as i usually do. which already does scare people oh dear. but i do not do anything to hurt other people, no matter how annoyed. i don't say things that hurt, that feel snappish, or are just mean assumptions.

is it so hard to ask that of everyone?

two people in my life recently has been doing this. on one hand, i understand they're going through a lot of stress and stretched to the maximum. but so are we all. it's not fair to the people around us. i'm ok, i've taken plenty of crap through my life. but don't do it to others please.





and i really really really really really don't want to perform tomorrow. it's giving me undue stress, i feel so unprepared. i've never gone to perform so unprepared before. it's so insecure, it's fear.
i finally completed 208 as well. it's not a fantastic effort, but it'll do. i'm too tired to bother anymore. probable quiz on thurs for 206. straight down the drain.

dance tomorrow. for the first time, i really really feel an insane urge to skip it. i'll be glad when this week is over.


living in my fantasy world

on Tuesday, February 17, 2009; 11:38 PM