hmm it's saturday.no more xx's trngs till end of promos. arrgghh i can't believe this.so now we're left with meng zu dance on 2nd sept. and then full steam ahead mugging for promos. but tell me, how am i supposed to mug when i can't even finish my tutorials and whatever crap? rawr.and some idiot when to attempt robbery in front of my sch. now mum's too freaked out to let me study in sch late. i had to leave at 7.30 yesterday. ahh but ok lar, i was super tired out already yesterday.lost control in sch. so many things happened, and then add on to that disastrous bio spa. i can't believe i freaking screwed an A LEVEL EXAM. i've never exactly screwed a national exam before. i've gotten erm... worse is a b3 at o's. and only ONE. so now i've got a D or and E or sth. so after spa i headed str for jie. i hate it when i lose control in frnt of other ppl. in frnt of just some ppl i'm ok with is ok, like jie. i just couldn't stop crying in when with her outside the com labs. and then i felt A LOT OF PPL pass by. and i kind of realised they were frm 73. which is. MY. OWN. CLASS. omg. hmm i nvr like showing any side of me tt's not happy and they saw it. omg omg omg. and then when i went to the com lab to put my bag before finding ms tan i saw brandon and darren, and nick's bag. like wth! i seriously hate it man. nvr md. ms tan was super nice. she let me pon chem remedial after i told her i din do the work. after i proposed that i complete it over the weekend and looked for her myself nxt wk of course. i've almost finished it. just a few hanging qns that i'm too lazy to tackle.freaking lots of things to do. no time to mug. pissed off.n jie! i'm onto comfort food again. i kept eating the whole day through. eat eat eat eat. non-stop. ppl tell me i've lost weight, esp on my face. how funny. i gained weight. erm i'm at a new number. shit. nvr md if u dun undst. i'll rather you din. most of us ( or maybe just dancer family, i dunno) are quite UNkeen to do the 2nd sept performance. i tink it's just that we're unable to cope wif both sch and dance tgt, and obviously we're being forced to make sch the first priority. but me n jie are quite excited about maf! i tink it's the chance to dance without pressure of schwk tt's so good about it. after all, maf is AFTER promos!!! wheee! i might actually enjoy that dance, even if i dun really REALLY like the choreo. i'm just ok with it. not crazy over it like i was with daidao. it's freaking warm at my place now. i can't stand it. i want my cheesecake. n mum's promised to buy. let's see when it'll happen.when's things going to get better? after promos. but then there's still this interpersonal relationship problem that is not gg to get better after promos. of maybe it will. i dunno. i kind of still cherish what i had, but it's weird. nvr md. i can't pretend i'm not hurt, but neither will i keep thinking about it i guess.walked a LONGGGGG way today in e morn wif my parents. first outing out tgt in mths. and we had a lot of fun laughing about the nonsensical things we can say to each other. it's quite fun walking all the way to the park, exploring different corners and then walking back hm haha. i've got to learn to appreciate these moments more. mmm.i'm tired. again. i slpt like A LOT today. i'll just continue to sleep a lot then. hiaz.inefficient mugging day.
living in my fantasy world
on Saturday, August 19, 2006; 10:35 PM
