just came back frm gym com.memories start rushing back to me.of the days we spent toiling in the gymwhether as xiaojiti 03 wif xinling always breathing down our necks as dui zhangn scolding us for all our mistakesor doing ball hoop clubs ribbons 3 times each four times a wk.going down wif xinling or steph after our routines to get h2o n restit was always xinling me abby zhunian steph if i din rmb wronglyas in e position tt we practiced e routines.n how we always had pep toks wif laoshin of cos mrs see who was always dere for usdos were such wonderful times no matter how tired we werethose were the days.we shared so much, gave so muchyet wat do we get in the end?a closure.much as i am enjoying my time in dancei still relli miss gymi relli luved it.i still dothey say time heals all woundsyet no one ever said the wounds were reopenableby times such as thisthe wat ifs start coming backwat if ms k nvr planted the seed of closure in mdm mak's mindwould it haf ever happened?wat if i had continued?i would haf been doing optionalsprobably ribbon n ballwat if i was born a yr earlier?then i might haf been able to leave happily wif onli fond memories of r.gymn none of the pain of closurebut if tt had happenedi would nvr haf had dance.
yet i'm still upset tt mdm mak used the excuse of the bigger ccas needing more pplthus closing e smaller ccas would transfer e ppl derebut den she goes to set up a shooting clubwif 20 ppl in just sec one n twowhen we onli had 19 ppl in all four levelsnow how fair is tt.i haf nth to say about it.rhythmic gymnasticsthx so much for having been part of my lifethough now i can no longer do anything but keep track of e competitionsn of course wat happens in international r.gymlike changes in apparatusi will nvr ever gif u upnvr.in my heart u will always haf a place to stayenuf bout emotionsno i am not crying.who am i kidding?esther got 2nd for ribbonzhunian got tt tooplus 2rd for clubsseeing zhunian continue is greatcos it feels more...continuedwell i saw amy doing a divn zhixu n aster doing dajitidis yr's dajiti routine is coolluved it.but onli rgs was up to standardno i swear i'm not biasedrgs was relli relli gdgd job ppl!but erm xiaojiti wasn't up to scratch din stay for e resultsbut yar thot onli chij tp was gdi mean, if we had been lidat, xinling would haf KILLED usour ears would haf gone deaf frm her screamingbut thx to her we did well 2 yrs agoso yar thx xinlingbut e overall standard of the competition droppedwas quite disappointed.oh well.maybe all dis should not be online at allit's not too nicey wasn't i one of those dressed in leotards?y wasn't i one of those trng like crazy down dere?y wasn't i one of those putting on thick makeup?y wasn't i one of those who were stretching?it all boils down to one person.e one who made us close.thx so much for taking wat meant so much to me awayindividual
ballclubsribbonropexiaojiti
five ropes (erm thot e routine was weird)dajiti
2 balls 3 hoops(it was damn cool lar!)super nice routine
i relli hope r.gym wouldn't find itself dwindling in singaporeit's such a gd sportfor e mind n e bodymrs see i agree wif youit should be more promotedesp in girls' schsbut tt's sumtin tt can't be helped.too bad.
so now two things tt matter so much to me has endeddance has ended for sec 4sr.gym has ended forever in nysuddenly it feels like dere's nth to live for anymoremy life had revolved arnd dos 2 things previouslynow...oh well at least i can study for prelims rediis tt gd or bad?i relli haf no ideachen laoshi asked me when she met me outside e humans staffroom:追什么?追成绩ok laoshii'm a little more calm now.no longer tt emotionali suppose tt's numbnessor maybe it's e shower.yar i went to shower b4 finishing dis postso tt's the end.the end of the paths that we chosethough my path forked off frm mq esther xinying n xinyan'sit still met well i just wanna say thxfor hafing been wif me for those 3 yrsthose 3 unforgettable yrsn mq xinying for being n xiaojiti 03 wif men esther n xinyan for being such wonderful friendsit seems just yest we were having our first trngwif e snrs like zhunian steph shiru n other teaching us how to rao chiun now we r hereu guys all did a great job todaymake sure u all noe tt.so now we leaveproud of wat we once werehey ten yrs laterwe'll look at e videos n photosn say: wow. we could do ttgoodbye. it seems like the best word to end this entry-dreams. does it ever come true anymore?-
living in my fantasy world
on Friday, July 22, 2005; 8:48 PM
